I know I've made fun of a lot of shit, but this takes the cake

OMG.

I just don't know what to say. This is just too good. [Edit: Hat tip to Bad Money Advice for the article]

I know I promised actual stock analysis. And you'll get it. Maybe even soon. But this article on a frugal and free food source was just too awesome to pass up. Their tip? Stay tuned, it gets wacky!

Frugal and free, two words that puts a spring in the step of anyone wanting to cut back on spending.

You know what else puts a spring in frugaldouches' steps? Stupid advice that nobody in the real world would ever follow. Like really out there shit like, oh I don't know, going to pick berries in the woods. But it couldn't be that, cause even frugaldouches wouldn't be that stupid, would they?

A few tears [sic] ago I was introduced to the idea of foraging for plants that grew wild and that were totally delicious to eat but that had just been forgotten by the modern world.

Holy shit! I was just kidding up there. Some guy actually goes out into the woods for food? What is he, a goat?

Also I enjoy the typo of tears instead of years. It's fitting.

I must admit that at first I was a little sceptical and worried...

You think? No shit.

So I took some time to discover just what I was missing and I soon discovered that there were a multitude of wild plants that could be collected that were just as delicious as any that I could by [sic] in the supermarkets.

Except you have to go to the fucking woods to harvest them.

Many of the plants that grow freely in the wild are edible and are full of healthy nutrients as well as being incredibly delicious.

Except you have to go to the fucking woods to harvest them.

Foraging for food is becoming more and more popular, as many people all over the world rediscover forgotten plants etc that were once a part of a staple diet many years ago and that grow wild in the countryside.

Except you have to go to the fucking woods to... Are you even paying attention? Nobody is going to go to the woods to harvest potentially poisonous berries. It's stupid. That's why nobody else does this.

A few examples of frugal and free food that can be found whilst foraging are:

I just threw this line in because I enjoyed his use of whilst. This coming from the same guy who has more typos than a 9th grader without a spellcheck.

Is he trying to sound smart? While telling people to go look in the woods for food?

Berries - blackberries, elderberries, wild strawberries and Dewberries are just a few of the most common ones found growing wild. These are great for making wine, putting in pies, making jam and can be frozen so that you have a store of fresh summer fruit throughout the year.

Umm... if fruit is frozen, I'm pretty sure it isn't fresh anymore.

He goes on, but I just can't bear it.

This guy is telling us to go to the fucking woods and hunt for plants. Let's just take a moment for this to sink in. The woods. For food. Where bears hang out. FUCK!

I realize that grouping this crazy chicken with other frugal people is like grouping all people who ride a motorbike as part of a biker gang. Saying that, how thin is the line between this and making your own laundry detergent? This is why I hate those frugal website people so much. It doesn't take much to go from tips like cutting coupons to stupid shit like this.

I have to go before I throw my laptop out the window. Bye guys.