Okay, you all know that I just can't stand useless blogs. If you're going to put a lot of time and energy into something, I think you should do it right.
I think most of these people know deep down that they're idiots. They just throw together posts because they have to put something out there, and when the shit hits the fan, they just say "oh well, you can't blame me. I'm not a serious journalist."
Moneygardener actually did this. And he wonders why I shit on him.
Hey Moneygardener: Throwing out a useless post makes you the blogging version of that annoying guy who will argue the color of the sky. And I don't know about you, but I hate those douches.
Anyhoo, the latest victim is the girl from Dog Ate My Finances. This blog chronicles the author and her fiance's journey to get out of mountains of debt and their quest to grow their net worth. The author also wants to save up for a wedding, and start saving for retirement. Pretty ambitious.
There's only one problem: they make serious money. Like a shitload of money. Check out this post for a summary of what they've paid off in the last year:
* 6,400 in family debt (OUCH! That was humiliating.)
* 25,000 on a rip-off car loan
* 30,302 in car debt to buy a second, luxury car
* 18,350 in business start up costs
* 22,000 credit card debt (as of December 2007)
* over 100K in student loans
Now I'm no math or accounting major (the girl who writes this blog is though), but even my rudimentary math skills can figure out that's over TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND FUCKING DOLLARS IN DEBT. And they paid it off. Maybe not in a year like I mentioned, but pretty quickly.
Okay, maybe they cut out all unnecessary spending to reach their goal. Let's take a look...
Well, they have a maid. And she gave her boss' secretary a $150 gift card which "isn't that much for me."
They drive such a nice car that "valets like it because it is such a rare car." Valets! Now I'm no valet, nor do I frequent places where there are valets, yet I'm sure that she isn't talking about a nice Chevy Cavilier or anything. Even a pimped out one.
Upon further reading, they actually have TWO flashy cars.
The young couple wants to buy a $500,000 house. In Houston. Where the average house price is $187,766. Why so much? They have their heart set on certain high class neighborhoods because they don't "do" commuting. Riiiight. Or yard work either apparently.
I can go on, but you get the picture.
Now I don't want to look like one of those guys who are jealous of other people's success. The couple has worked hard, and deserves every penny of their salary, even if I think they're obviously spoiled brats.
Here's the biggest issue: the couple makes just about $250,000 per year. So you saved your ass off making a quarter of a million dollars a year? How hard is that? You didn't accomplish anything more than cutting the fat from a lifestyle which was pretty much all fat. You fell ass backward into it. Stop talking like you've accomplished something of value. It's hard to have sympathy for anyone who can get into so much trouble while having so much.
Oh and by the way, they actually only paid off a little over $30,000 in debt over 2008. On a $250,000 salary. At least we think. I'm confused on how the debt goes from that to the figures I quoted above.
It looks like the couple managed to save about 30% of their income. If they made $50,000 or $100,000 a year this would be impressive. Instead, they saved about $75,000 of a $250,000 income, leaving them with a paltry $175,000 to make ends meet. Boo fucking hoo.
Stay tuned for when Dog Ate My Finances brags about some of her other accomplishments:
a) Both her and her fiance managed to eat out for under the cost of a mortgage payment
b) She got her own bottle of Cristal (Jeeves was out, presumably slitting his wrists)
c) She bought a Gucci purse instead of a Coach* (it is a recession after all)
d) She wiped her OWN ass.
* I have no idea if a Gucci purse is more or less expensive than a Coach. And Google wasn't helpful.
Oh, and one more thing. Here's part of the disclaimer at the bottom of the blog:
Details have been changed to protect the innocent. Maybe a little, maybe a lot. This is just a story, not any kind of advice--financial or otherwise. Go make your own story.
Nice! So it's just all shit you made up? And yet I'm sure you'll still take the moral high ground.
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2 comments:
i'm pretty sure her blog is all the product of an overactive imagination. I think she's a budding writer looking for a way to amuse herself. Nothing she says adds up
I'm late to the party but so was Undercover Vixen.
That blog appears to be falling apart. It never was believable to me, and I detect a tone and expressions used by someone in the 50+ (maybe way plus) age range. Possibly male. And a whole lot of numbers pulled out of thin air.
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